– Next week, John Cleese celebrates his 80th birthday!
– No, he doesn’t
– Yes, he does.
– No way.
– Oh yes. He most certainly does. I have made a painting of his latest supper to his honour!
– Are you from Barcelona, you great big half-wit? By the way, I dont like your painting…. What in God’s name possessed you to paint three John Cleeses in it?
– It works, mate!
– There was only ONE John Cleese and FIVE other Pythons!!!
– No conjurers? No mariachi bands? No kangaroos or trampoline acts? No waiters serving Waldorf salad, no old ladies with hearing problems, no psychiatrists or public health inspectors? No rats?
– Absolutely not. No riff-raff was allowed in Python! Enough of this nonsense! And saying that John Cleese turns eighty next week is blasphemy, you are to be stoned to death!
– I dont think it is blasphemy, just saying that John Cleese turns eighty,
– Blasphemy! You said it again! You are only making it worse for yourself!
– Making it worse? How could it be worse. John Cleese turns eighty! John Cleese turns eighty! John Cleese turns eighty!
– I’m warning you! If you say ”John Cleese turns eighty“ again….
– You? Warning me? Who do you think you are?
– I am your minister for silly walks among other things.
– Well, how did you become minister then? I didn’t vote for you.
– The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water signifying by Divine Providence that I was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your minister!
– Bollocks! We’re an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week. But all the decisions of that officer have to be ratified at a special biweekly meeting. By a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs, but by a two-thirds majority in the case of more—
– Be quiet!
– I tell you what you are. You are an ex-minister, bereft of life, you are no more, you’ve shuffled off your mortal coil, you have run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisible!! PISS OFF!!
– Well….I never wanted to be in this silly sketch anyway…I always wanted to BE A LUMBERJACK! Besides, what has John Cleese ever done for us….
Guldstjärna till den som kan identifiera alla de geniala sketcherna som inspirerat detta inlägg.
SKOTT FRÅN HÖFTEN 